Some say not long ago I was touring the world. But right now I have homework in statistics to do.

Quite a fall.

Not that it's surprising, but I can hardly remember the Trip by now. Well I do remember, but it doesn't seem like anything that ever happened to me. I can't believe not so long ago me & May were driving freely (On the occasions when Marvin would start) along the highways (usually lost) with the radio at full volume (Still not hearing anything because of the wind - no air conditioning), Not knowing where we'd sleep at night (And usually not wanting to know), with a load of Coca-cola stacked in our fabulous back seat.

The fact that not that much longer ago I was flying through space, and not liking it at all, seems, fortunately, utterly refuted.

For the few of you who have been reading this Page consistently, this may seem like a sudden change. I was a soldier on a spaceship, now I'm a student on a bicycle. What gives?


  		Well, a long time has passed, as you know, and things, as hard as it is for me to admit it, change. People move on. That's the way things are happening here in the fabulous land of Iz: You finish school, you do your time in the army, you go out to see some of the world, you come back to school again. Am I the only one who feels like I'm going in circles here?

I'm afraid my course was almost normal. After finishing the army I obediently went on a trip abroad, and then came back to college - the only question was which college to go to.

Big question, actually.


People always ask you what do you want to be when you grow up, but they take it lightly, and "I dunno" is as good an answer as any. You'll be considered Cute. (Actually, I don't know of any answer to this question that wouldn't be considered cute. I could try "serial killer".) But when you finish doing your time in the army, sign all those papers, and then walk out to the street, relieved, thinking you're finally free, there's this guy who hides behind the corner, jumps you, grabs you, twists your arm and whisper evilly in your ear, "So, what do you want to be when you grow up? You've got 20 seconds."

20 seconds is the time you have left until the university registration for next year closes. And these days, even saying "I don't want to do anything with my life. I'll just work at McDonald's until I'm 80" won't cut it. The registration for a degree in hamburgerology closes at march 22. You better hurry. Think I'm kidding?

I don't want to work at McDonalds. I've had 3 years of brainless robotic work and that was enough for me. On the other hand, I don't want to be a lawyer. I never wanted to be a lawyer. I never even considered being a lawyer. I don't think I'm fit to be a lawyer, okay!? So would you please shut up about being a lawyer. I don't want to be a doctor, either. That pretty much sums up the possibilities of anyone ever making a movie based on my life. There are still only movies about lawyers and doctors, and not many movies about programmers. That's the only reason I can think of why people still want their offsprings to be lawyers instead of programmers. For god's sake, it pays better, and it doesn't take 7-10 years of study, either.

On the other hand, (the first hand, in case you forgot, was me not wanting to be a lawyer or a hamburger man) I have no real idea what I want to be. When uncles and grandparents asked me what I wanted to be when I was 5, I said I wanted to be a writer, and that shut them up. But that was before I knew about the internet, and before I learned that being a writer is not something you can apply for. Sadly for me, you can't call a book-writing company and say "Hello, I just got my degree at Science Fiction writing, majoring in interplanetary chase scenes. Do you happen to have an opening?"

What's really weird is that in the movies industry it does seem to work that way. Except the answer is always no. So I crossed that option too.


So what the hell do I want to do? I want to write weird web pages and somehow get paid for it. Yeah. That'll happen.

Alright, so I don't know exactly what I want that is within reason, but at least I know it'll have something to do with computers. As I said, it pays good, and there's always work. So I took a two-year Alugktogajic course in Holy College, and we'll see then. To make things a little more interesting I took one with a tiny bit of Cinema in it, which makes it a Multimedia course. And I'm pretty happy with my decision so far, I've got to say: I don't work too hard, and I can play around with a pretty good computer as long as I want, pretending to practice my C. Ha.

What I didn't take into account is how basic Alugktogajic courses really are. Of course, I didn't expect anyone taking an Alugktogajic (Absolute Least U Gotta Know To Get A Job In Computers course) to be a computer expert, but I didn't think I'd learn how to doubleclick all over again. On my first Monday, for example, I had 4 hours of C lessons (Not an #include in sight: we were doing flow charts), then two hours of Computer Operating (Basic Windowing), then English (in case you haven't noticed: I can speak English), and then another 4 hours of Cinematic Studies (What is a shot? What is a Long Shot? How many frames are there per second? What is a Frame? What is a Second?) What can I say: I've had a tough day at the library.

But that's nothing. Next year, I'll have to study - hang on to your boots, fellows - HTML!! I really don't know if I'll be able to handle it.

Boredom in itself isn't new to me. I remember spending plenty of time in the library, back in school. In general, this college thing reminds me of my school days. It's pretty similar, except the tables are yellow and not green, and the Black Boards are white. Oh, and May is not here.




Ask any american kid or parent: They all can't wait till they go to college, because that'll be the day they'll Leave Home. They'll say goodbye to their mother, who'll shed a few tears, hug the dog, get a some parently advice - which is supposed to cling to memory until the end of times, but never quite do - from his father, and be off on his way, by bus or by plane, to his College, far away, to begin a new life of partying down. Or so it seems from here; correct me if I'm wrong.

Holy College, as I found out, is exactly one hour's driving from Destination.

That's what you get from living in a small country. so much for Leaving Home.

The place I live in is a nice, quiet village on the shore of Holy Lake. Most people who leave there get pretty excited about it's being so quiet, but of course, I've always lived in a small village (without the lake, holy or not). There aren't that many people here, though. Most of my neighbours are Emus. But that's okay - they're nice enough. Polite. Still, thank Amanda, my roommate is a human being. I'll probably tell you about him one day. Right now I have homework in Statistics to do.