They're Baaaack!

a year passed, and here we are again (you didn't really think that we will let you go clean this time, huh?).


 

 

It's not like we've been doing this thing for 37 years, you know. So we made it into our second year in a row. Wow. What an achievement. They have to give us the Oscar for this. Okay folks, this is how it'll go: We'll give you our list of 11 (or 12, or 13, we haven't decided yet) Best & Worst movies of the year, like last year, and fill the spaces around it with all kinds of nonsense and gibberish you'll take hours to try to understand, in vain. (We don't know what we mean either). Deal?

deal!

I wasn't talking to you.

DUH! well maybe if will will start talking to me i won't feel like i have to answer questions you ask other people that cannot answer anyway!!!

This is a truly interactive medium. (See? I told you we have no idea what we're talking about.) Okay. I think it may be better for everyone involved if we skip the talking-around and go straight to the Movie Reviews. But if you don't mind, May, try to keep it a little more to the point this time, okay?

what is the point in talking to the point? and what is the point anyway? i mean, i thought that i'm the one who is talking about the things that really count, and you are the one that keep trying to say stuff about stuff that nobody cares about.

It may still be helpful if we try to talk about the movie, rather than about any number of irrelevant things.

when you say "irrelevant things" that do you mean?

Well, you can try not to mention boobs more than 3 times in any one review.

HA! well let me see? if you say boobs, do i still have 3 times in that review? and can i say 3 times boobs and 3 times tits and 3 times breasts?

Did I mention lately that you're terminally sick?

mmm....... yes you did.

So I have to admit I had a point. Just... try to keep it to a civilized level, okay? Please? This time?

mmm.... nah....

Shouldn't have hoped.

      A truly titanic year
Okay, so it's summarizing time. What did we have this year? Many cool aliens (even more than in previous years), A couple of very big ships, many movies turning strangely religious, hardly any quality movies but many very fun ones. And almost nothing to talk about in the un-american portion.





 we had some great popcorn, and some really bad coke. we shot some people that talked too much (or at least we wish that is was allowed to bring guns into the theater). she saw some new great bodies and some not so good old ones. we laughed and screamed. we had a good time!!

You'll soon make me cry again. Ah, yeah, and there was titanic. I'm telling you, if you're only going to see one movie this year, you should really get out more.
But you better see Titanic. People will shoot you if you don't.

think of hollywood in few years. they will want to make a sci-fi movie and the bad guys will be the ones that didn't see titanic.

There are many people who never saw a movie in their life - I think they will be pretty surprised when they see Titanic. "Tell me, dear - do you go to many of those motion picture things? Is the yellow-haired guy in all of them?"

as loyal servants of the public we have a scoop: there were few other movies this year and some of them even didn't have any kind of ship in them.

      The Absent Goddesses






This was also the year when we realized that special computer effects can do anything, and I do mean anything. What just a couple of years ago was considered impossible is now being dismissed by audiences as primitive. Spawn, for example.

in no time we could made full movies without any real actors. just take a picture of them and the rest is a puter history. that makes me think how nice it will be to make titanic all over again, and just to place leo with Gina (the goddess), and kate with anne heche. mmmm......

I'd like to see The full monty with a couple of digitally replaces actresses. That will be interesting. But I'm surprised you haven't yet complained about the lack of your goddesses from movies this year.

it wasn't that there was a lack in the world, they just didn't come to the land of iz. and what can i say that i didn't say before? i did miss emma a lot. and i'm still sorry that i went to see demi.

So it wasn't a very good year for you after all.

yep. the better movies got worse and the worse movies got better.

May!! That was profound!

what is profound?

It's, em... ah, forget it.