An officer and a a Fish

No, I was not going to become an officer. No way. Not ever. Becoming an officer means a lot of money, but it also means spending more time in the army. You can guess my reaction to that.

It also means responsibility. The moment you're an officer of any kind, you're ruling something. There are people at your command - not always saluting and at ease,but they're there. And you're responsible for them - not always for their life and death, but sometimes to when will they get home. Which is not something to be taken lightly.

Not for me. I hate being given orders, but one thing I hate more is giving them. I know what I'm talking about - you don't spend three years in the Space Force without getting to some kind of a giving-orders position, if only a very low one. I hate that. Nobody ever do what I say. Well, maybe that's because I always feel guilty for making anyone do what they don't want to do - I usually end up doing all the work myself. I can't even tell someone to throw away the trash without adding a "please". I'll make a very poor officer. Literally.

So what am I doing studying for Night Duty? Not my choice really. NDO is just a title given to whoever it is that keeps the ship functioning during the day-to-day tasks of a night at StingRay SpaeBase, which is usually one of the normal soldiers that are on the last months of their service. which is where I am, praise Amanda. But what, I have to be an NDO now to get out of the army?

That's just insulting. They never asked me if I want to be a commander of anything; they just assumed I did. They never asked me if I wanted the responsibility, as small as it is. And I don't want it. I don't want it at all. I hate being responsible for anything but myself. Call me a kid, tell me to grow up, and I'll tell you to go away and let me keep playing with my little toys. I don't think that's such an absurd idea.